From: Ken Royer []
Sent: Thursday, September 02, 2010 7:54 AM
Subject: To our Colleagues in Personnel

Attachments: image001.jpg

                                                                             September, 2010


To Our Colleagues in Personnel…


This monthly “resource tool” is designed to provide insight for personnel workers in ministry-related areas.  If you would like to be removed from the list (or a friend would like to be added), please let me know… or


“Building Skills for Member Care with Excellence.”  Dates = Jan. 10-14, 2011.  We’d love to have you with us.  For more information check  Write for info / application. 


Openings in Link Care’s program of Restoration and Personal Growth:  now with the “summer crunch” behind us, we do have openings – please write or call.


In these monthly “tools for personnel workers” we seek to provide a help which is useful to you.  This month we’d like to discuss briefly the helpful tool of…



Reflective Listening


Through the years, we have observed that the busier “we” become (in ministry, home, support-raising, all the various details to keep going!), the less we take time to really listen to those who mean the most to us (our God, our spouse, our children, our colleagues).


In many discussions, we may find ourselves preparing an answer before the speaker has actually completed saying what he/she wanted to say. 


The tool of “Reflective Listening” provides an opportunity to speak (maximum 1 minute), and for the listener to mirror back what was heard – not correcting, not “fixing,” not defending.  Rather, “Here’s what I heard you saying … did I hear you correctly?” 


Once the original speaker is satisfied that the listener has heard correctly, the roles are reversed, and the previous listener now asks, “May I be the speaker?” and the process continues.


This approach may seem laborious and overly simple – but it is powerful!  To know we’ve really been heard accurately is a gift; we then may proceed to the next level of discussion.


We trust you will enjoy the article on the web site – and especially the cartoons!

Have a great month. 


Ken Royer, for Mary too and your Link Care Friends

1734 W. Shaw Ave; Fresno, CA 93711

559 439 5920 ext. 122;